Sunday, December 21, 2008

What is 791?

The number of times I have sat down on a sprinkled toilet seat in my career as a mom.

Here are a few more figures to consider:

17 - Nights I have slept through since Brahm was born
1 - Ambulance visits to the house
2,698 - Pokemon cards living in my home
559 - "Eeeeew, this is disguuuusting!" (in reference to supper)
3 - "This is the best supper I ever had." (in reference to some mac-and-cheese crap from a box)
16 - Viewings of Star Wars: Episode IV by Oliver
12,442 - Cursings emitted from my mouth after stepping on rogue Legos
324 - Washings of pee-pee sheets
3,888 - hours spent together driving in a car
39 - "That didn't hu-urt!"
39 - "Do you want me to make it hurt?"
8 - Trips to the Red Balloon so far this month
71 - Containers of Clorox Wipes purchased, bulk-size
411 - boxes of Band-Aids purchased
58 - Magic Tree House books on tape listened to in car
9,999 - "Here, watch this while I take a nap. And don't wake me up unless your head is on fire."
226 - "But I can't find it."
225 - Dollars collected for finding it myself
103 - knee-holes worn in jeans
81 - Nights spent holding a head over a barf bowl
12 - Trips to the principal's office
819 - "When will Dad be home?"


Liz said...

I am seriously laughing so hard! I am so relieved that I am normal....assuming you are too, of course. This post will serve as a great memory someday!

Heather said...

Sounds WAY to familiar- but you just need to add princess stuff and serious attitude and moodiness to my list!

Utah Grammie said...

Wait...just wait. The numbers become astronomical - then you start counting the gray hairs..then the years until retirement - then the years THEY will have to take care of you...then I will get my revenge!!!!

BakerBloggers-Matt & Jenny said...

I have never used the line "don't wake me unless your head is on fire". I think I will try that one for my nap tomorrow. Great post!

Anonymous said...

1. OK, what is the Red Balloon?
2. We have about sixty-five Magic Treehouse stories on CD. I HATE them with a passion, but C loves them. I will only put them on in the car if I have my mp3 player to listen to--even if I'm driving. I don't care if it's illegal. If I have to listen to that whiny bitch Annie cooing to Peanut one more time, I'll claw my way out of the car through the radiator.
3. I hear you on the Star Wars thing. I am way more familiar with the storyline now than I ever wanted to be.
4. I have actual Lego-sized calluses on my feet. Damn, those things hurt.